20 Jul 2010

Career, home or both?...

Hello!!!! Please excuse my long absence as i've been over my head with work. I'm not even married yet, not to talk of having kids and still i barely have time for myself. I really need to work on my time management if i plan to be a "Career wife and mom". Are there single ladies in the house that identify with what i'm talking about?

Anyway, i know that this "feat" will not be solved on it's own; i will need Gods' divine intervention and guidance to see me through. In the past, i noticed a trend where women just sat home and took care of children whilst their husbands had the job of "providing" for the home. Although i have nothing against this trend, i also believe there is a reason that couples are called "Partners". A lot of people will argue that the lady is also partnering with her husband even when carrying out only domestic duties, that she doesn't necessarily have to work. Whilst i agree with that, my question is "Is she less of a partner when she decides to bring some income into the home"? My discussions with working class wives have shown me that it isn't an easy job at all but not impossible. Infact some of them are fulfilled and don't run the risk of playing the "Had i known game".

I know this is a very "touchy" topic and whichever way it swings, each party will be right but since it's my blog, i'll be discussing my own take on the issue :) Now imagine a lady that is career minded, has a zeal to touch/affect lives, is more than willing to contribute financially to the growth of her home, is used to getting things done for herself  and wants to be a complete woman in all ramifications of life. Imagine this woman being mandated to become a complete house wife. Why? Because her partner believes that he earns more than enough to sustain the home & that her place is with the kids.... Will such a woman give her very best to the home? Will she be fulfilled? Won't she be more prone to nagging? Won't she be likely to make life a "living hell" for her partner? I'm not justifying women that have the above mentioned characteristics, i'm just saying that indeed "there is no smoke without fire". It won't harm couples to sit with each other and agree on how they want to run their home. It helps them understand each others dreams and aspirations and also helps to achieve them. It is important to understand that even when we come together as couples, it's okay to differ in some aspects, encourage individuality in a relationship and most of all we need to learn to compromise. I believe that when all that is in place, issues such as "House wife" and "Career wife" will be long sorted out before indeed it becomes an "issue".

As for me, i intend to be a Career wife and mom for the simple reason of being fulfilled in all aspects of my life. I want to be able to support my partner and home financially as well as be there for my kids. It isn't an easy task but you know what they say "nothing good comes easy". I also believe that since it's in line with my purpose, the Lord will back me every step of the way. Once i'm fulfilled and happy, i'm able to make everyone (especially close ones) around me feel the same. "You can't give what you don't have".

My final take on this issue is that we should all identify what makes us happy and work towards it, bearing in mind that sometimes we need to come to a compromise. A compromise that won't hamper our growth but will create room for our partner to grow too. A house wife can find a million and one things to do to occupy her time whilst a career wife can also find a way to make sure that her job doesn't distract her from carrying out her domestic duties. It doesn't also have to be a "9-5" job, it could be an establishment of her own.

May the Lord open the eyes of our understanding to discern that which is proper and may He guide us every step of the way, AMEN!

Whatever you decide, make sure it's in line with your purpose and partner :)

Stay Strong!

1 comment:

  1. I am taking a look at this posting at a time I need to be in bed. while I'm tempted to comment, I will hold back a bit until I wake up and have processed the blog. This is very dicey.