5 Dec 2012

I LIED...

I lied when I said you were the best thing that happened to me, you are better than the best


I lied when I told you I loved to cook; I actually love the expression of satisfaction on your face after you’ve had a delicious meal prepared by me

I lied when I said my heart skips a beat anytime I see you, my heart literally stops for a second. That’s how ‘breathtaking’ I find you

I lied when I said you mean the world to me, you are my world

I lied when I said I loved football, I just don’t mind anything that makes you happy

I lied when I said it’s hard to stay apart from you, the truth is a part of me dies when you leave

I lied when I said I was happy with you, truth is that you are my happiness

I lied when I said I couldn’t get my mind off you, truth is I didn’t want to

I lied when I said I thought about you today, truth is you’ve always been in my thoughts

I lied when I said I loved you, what I feel can’t be love. What I feel engulfs me; it takes over my senses, every other thing pales in comparison to what I feel for you. I have come to the conclusion that it isn’t love. What I feel for you transcends any human understanding; it is much more than love. It is a feeling that cannot be defined and that is why there’s no adequate word to describe it

I lied to you, because there was no better way to express how I feel…



Stay Strong!

6 Nov 2012

BE STILL!

That nagging feeling of drought and emptiness, that feeling that has clung to me for several days now, and it doesn’t seem like it has any plan of letting go


I open my mouth to speak but my eyes have a better way of expressing how I feel. Warm tears’ flowing down my cheeks as a river overflows its banks

I try to make sense of what is happening to me, I try to understand why the sudden despair and then I remember that it had always been there, bottled up so that no one could see

I almost fooled myself believing I had gone past the hurt. That the pain had become bearable, that I understood the delay and was very okay with it

However, my heart had taken more than its fair share. It could no longer bear the pain it felt

I decided to look to my Creator for answers; I called but didn’t get any response. I sent letters but no replies. I waited but never got a visit, and then I began to panic

I have never lived my life alone. How do I cope without His re-assurance? What sense did it make to keep hoping and praying when there was no response?

Just as I was about to let the pain completely engulf me… I heard the voice, almost inaudible but I heard it! I could not be mistaken; it was unlike anything I’ve ever heard. It wasn’t only about the words that were spoken but the way they were spoken…

The tears dried up immediately, my heart became whole, my lips parted and for the first time in a long while; I could speak! I could express myself!!!

I ranted on how much I needed HIM, how I was in so much pain but HE abandoned me. How lonely I felt and how I was about losing it…

HE let me talk to my hearts’ content and when I was done HE repeated the same words I heard earlier, “BE STILL”

There and then I knew I got it all wrong in the beginning….

HE was there all along, working things out for my good. Perhaps not as fast as I wanted, probably not exactly how I wanted but exactly how I needed it. Just PERFECT as always…

So yet again the tears flowed, but this time with a smile on my face. Tears of gratitude to the ONE who is ALWAYS about my business

To the ONE who requires one thing of me…. “BE STILL”

  Stay Strong!

29 Oct 2012

STUPIDITY!

In the land of Stupidity, the Smart person is seen as weird…


I believe because of the aforementioned sentence, someone once advised that “if you can’t beat them, you join them”…

However in this case, I refuse to join “them”…

Call me whatever you like but I’m smart enough to recognize Stupidity from a mile away

Not because I’m the smartest person on earth but my ‘one too many’ clashes with Stupidity has given me serious allergies to this epidemic

Lately I have been wondering how this came upon us and why most of us have decided to accept 'it' as the norm

Perhaps, trying to change things will make us unpopular and not in vogue

Perhaps, if it doesn’t affect us directly, then it isn’t our business

Perhaps, because many people have tried to correct the wrong in the past and failed, we believe it isn’t worth the try again

Perhaps, we may be wrong! If you refuse to accept Stupidity and try to change it, then it will no longer be the norm

I bet you are wondering what I call Stupidity?

Jungle and Mob justice is Stupidity…

Killing of innocent individuals for whatever cause is Stupidity…

Looting of public funds is Stupidity….

Being irresponsible in a position of responsibility is Stupidity…

Breaking laws to suit personal benefits is Stupidity….

Passing unfair judgment is Stupidity….

Corruption is Stupidity….

Heartlessness and Insensitivity to the plight of your fellow human being is Stupidity….

….and the height of Stupidity is not acknowledging that there is a God who has the ability to end our lives at anytime. A God, who should be reverenced, obeyed and can NEVER be mocked

So in this land of Stupidity, would you rather be with the majority or join the Smart minority and risk being called weird?

The choice is yours… Choose wisely because your decision can make or mar you!





Stay Strong!

18 Oct 2012

MY COUNTRY, MY PAIN...

So I have watched with dismay as my Country degenerates to nothing short of a jungle with wild animals living within. The stories abound nowadays are enough to make any hard hearted person weep profusely


We were gradually getting over the gruesome murder of Cynthia before the ALUU 4 issue came up and just yesterday I heard over the radio of a woman that was stripped naked and humiliated because she was “suspected” of shoplifting. This has gone too far and needs to stop before we infect the next generation with such despicable acts of violence

I haven’t had the heart to watch the ALUU 4 video because the sound of it alone disgusts me and is too painful for me to comprehend. How did anyone think that wasting the lives of these youths was a bright idea? Who the hell are we to take life when we cannot guarantee our next breath not to talk of create a human being? The onlookers and perpetrators of that gruesome act are equally guilty. I am not even going to comment on those who recorded the whole scene… Burning human beings alive in the 21st century? Who does that? I seriously doubt that the lowest of animals will descend so low to carry out such an evil act and we call ourselves human beings? It is so painful to know that we were created in the image of God but through the act of “freewill”, we have become nothing like our Father. It’s a SHAME

Rather than watch these boys groan in pain, couldn’t the onlookers get the Police? Oh, I forgot, those ones can’t be trusted either. But that doesn’t justify jungle justice. It doesn’t give anyone the right to harm another human being. We pray like no other Country but our sins are World class. How can you expect things to go well for you, when you can’t love or respect your neighbor? Which part of “judge not so that ye shall not be judged” do we not understand? Or “remove the log in your eyes before removing the speck in your neighbors’ eyes”?

As much as we love to blame our leaders for all the problems we face in this country, I dare say that the bulk of the problem lies with us. It must be really hard to lead a bunch of dimwits that are not fit to be called human beings. I am beyond upset because whilst a few people are trying hard to move the country forward, we still have a large majority that is not only satisfied with mediocrity but would rather we return to the Stone Age. Kilode? O gini?

I cannot change my Nationality and I’m not about to deny my Country but I won’t sit back and act as though all is well with us. It is not! The sooner we realize this, the better for us. We think our problem is lack of steady power supply, bad roads, unemployment, bad leadership…. But we are the real problem. Can’t we follow the simple rule of, “don’t do to others, what we won’t want done to us”. If that’s too hard to do, then just remember that NO ONE has the right to mistreat another human being not to talk of taking his life

We are not animals! We are all made in the image and likeness of God which means there’s a piece of Him in all of us. If you catch a thief, murderer, rapist…etc, as much as he deserves punishment, allow that to be done by the appropriate authorities. Yes we may not trust them but let’s play our part and leave them to the hands of their creator

My children will not be brought in an animalistic society with no regards for human life. It is time for us to turn from our evil ways. This is everyone’s’ problem and needs to be tackled before it becomes an epidemic. We are not animals! We have a heart, we have brains; it won’t hurt for us to use them once in a while!

My sincere condolences to the friends and family of the ALUU 4 victims. It didn’t have to happen, it could have been avoided but the Lord knows best.

I weep for my Country as I see the misplaced priorities and unutilized chances. Our potentials are great but it takes a right thinking Citizenry to exploit them.



Stay Strong!

3 Oct 2012

52 AND STILL SEARCHING...

So I turned 52 years old a couple of days back and I am reminded once more of how old I have become,


I have had many suitors, even married a few of them but it just doesn’t feel like I have found the ‘one’

I know I have come a long way and even though I am not where I ought to be, I am not where I used to be. I am now a mother, grandmother and even a great grandmother…

My many children are the result of my various relationships/marriages but I still love them equally

However, in recent times; my children have decided to fight against each other, claiming they are better than the other and this saddens me a lot

They have deviated from the very essence of unity, respect and loyalty I had taught them

Whilst I may have made many promises that I am yet to fulfill, I still love my children very much

The trauma of moving from one bad relationship to the other is enough to make anyone confused

My past husbands have had good intentions but good intentions are just not enough to make me or my children happy. We need much more…

When I look at my counterparts, I realize that at 52; I still have a long way to go. However I cannot do this without the help of my children

The change we need isn’t going to come from outside, WE are to effect the change we desire. We need to stop playing the ‘blame game’ and looking for ‘scape goats’

I don’t know it all and I can’t do it on my own, I need YOU

We may not have achieved all that we have set out to do in the past 52 years but if we are to be honest with ourselves, we have also experienced some positive changes

I am proud that I have very clever, hardworking children and if guided aright, can bring the ‘light’ that we so earnestly desire

We must realize that it requires dedication, steadfastness and hard work from us all

I am 52 and still searching…. But until I find the right “one” to lead us all right, please help me start the change that we all desire. We can only get ‘it’ done together.

I am proud of my children, I am proud of my history, I am proud of roots, I am proudly NAIJA! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! :)

Stay Strong!

24 Sept 2012

When we love...

So I set out today not knowing what I was going to write. This wasn’t because I didn’t know what to write, I just had too much on my mind…


Humans are very complex and every pain or hurt we experience today is of our own making. We were created in the likeness of a peaceful and loving God, I wonder how we became this wicked. The Lord gave us power and dominion to rule over things on earth but what did we do? We used our powers to become slaves to the things on earth. The Lord gave us free will to discern good from evil but we used the freewill to create mayhem in our world. We were created superior than the beasts in the field but today, some of us act worse than those beasts. Look at what has become of our world today; no day goes by without hearing of some murder, crime, rape, robbery… We have become a shadow of ourselves without even knowing it

I still marvel at how a person can take the life of another so easily. How can one who isn’t guaranteed the next breath, think it wise to cut short the life of another? Absurd! Strange! Sad! If you have no power to give life, why on earth do you think it wise to take another? People are dying every day like chickens and at this rate, I wonder why the Lord hasn’t wiped us all out in anger because you see, HE has the power to do so. He doesn’t have to explain it to us, take our permission or apologize for it. HE created us and HE can very well end HIS creation but He hasn’t. That got me thinking….

Just the other day I was listening to a song on the radio and the lyrics went something like this; “…HE sent HIS only Son to die for us, HE didn’t have to but HE did… HE could have sent a legion of angels in HIS place but HE chose to send HIS son…” Now that also got me thinking…. HE sees the end of a thing before it begins so surely HE knew that the human race was going to be a great disappointment but HE still sent HIS Son. You cannot explain such love and sacrifice and it makes me wonder; how on earth can anyone say there is no God? Or how can you say you serve this God of love, yet hate your fellow human being so badly?

I open the newspapers and all I read about is war, cyber crime, riots, babies abandoned in the refuse bin, people dying from hunger, corruption, looting of public funds, scams…etc. It all has to stop!!! When will we realize that at the end of the day, what will count is our contribution to the society/world? Are we going to leave the world a better place for our kids or not? We are answerable to a higher being and HIS plans for us are of peace and not of evil. Do we not know that love is a stronger weapon than hate? Do we not know that no one is better than the other and we are all equal in HIS eyes? Do we not know that no one is promised tomorrow? Do we not know that there is a piece of God in all of us?

My heart is very heavy from the things I see today and I am afraid that if care is not taken, things may get worse. It is even more painful when you see children roped into these evil acts that they have learnt from adults. We have deprived them of their innocence and forced them into early adulthood.

Let me make this clear, killing isn’t only physical. In fact, most of the damage done today is psychological. Most people walk around today with a broken heart, a scar, shattered dreams… all because some other person decided to play god.

It takes a lot of energy to hate but a lot less to love. When we love, we forgive. When we love, we help. When we love, we protect not destroy. When we love, we see ourselves in the other person. WHEN WE LOVE, WE TRULY LIVE!







Stay Strong!











18 Sept 2012

FOR THE LOVE OF SHOES!!!!!

Hello friends, I apologize for the break in transmission. Several road trips and unstable internet connection resulted to no blogging :)


So back to today’s’ post, Just the other day, a very dear friend wanted to know what my hobbies where and my favorite things in the world. I thought to myself “well that’s really easy. I love to eat out occasionally at a nice cozy good restaurant. My love for pasta knows no bounds and a glass of very good red wine will just complete the meal :) As for my favorite things, I guess shoes and bags are it! Scratch that, I love shoes more!! :)))

You know that feeling when you walk into a shoe store and time stands still for you? When it seems like all the shoes are speaking to you, trying to get you to try them on? Well, that’s a wonderful feeling and I get that every time I walk into a shoe store. First off, I check out the ‘high heels section’. I am more of 6-8 inches, pencil heels lady. I’m not a big fan of “block heels” but love me some ‘wedges” occasionally. Great pair of shoes has a way of completing an otherwise frumpy look. It gives you that attitude, that confidence and not to mention elegance :)

Usually when I go window shopping, I try to avoid shoe stores but even when I walk by and struggle not to see them, they seem to call out my name. It’s really hard. Sometimes, I tell myself that it’s okay to just take a peek. After all, there’s no harm in day dreaming. However, the mistake I always make is that I try them on. Once I have them on my feet, it feels like my life will be incomplete if I left the store without them. So I came up with another game plan, never to go window shopping with my credit card.

Once, I saw a lovely pair of shoes online and decided to go get them from the store later on in the week. Long story short, I got to the store and left with 3 pairs of shoes instead of one. So I made a mental note, “I had better stick to online shopping”. Order and have it delivered to my doorstep.

My mother thinks it’s an obsession, I happen to believe it’s just a necessity. I look at every pair of shoes I have and can hardly imagine not having any one of them. Unfortunately my love of shoes also extends to guys. The first thing I notice in a guy at our first meeting are his pair of shoes. That singular act has in the past contributed to my decision of whether or not to have a second meeting with the guy. Some people may call me vain right now but truth be told, isn’t there something really sexy about a guy who has wonderful dress sense and lovely pair of shoes to go with it? Abi, you wan tell me say if your guy come take you out with all dem “boat shaped” Aba made shoes, u no go hide ya face? Abegi, make I hear word! Seriously though, as important shoes are, abeg they are not a recipe to wonderful relationships. If e dey affect you like me and you like the guy, gently nudge him to get better stylish shoes or kukuma buy them for him. All na investment! :)

Overtime, I have realized that the shoes don’t have to be overly expensive to look beautiful. Trust me; I have seen really ugly expensive shoes. I guess it’s all about your style, taste and how you combine them with your outfit. Some shoes give your legs that extra lift, some make them look smaller others are just made to give you that extra bounce in your steps. Whatever our style, they need to be clean, well kept and stylish.

So lately I’ve been pondering, if people say you need to study or work in the area that gives you great joy; FOR THE LOVE OF SHOES, can’t we have a course known as SHOEOLOGY? Which according to my dictionary will mean, “The study of shoes and the positive impact on the Human race”? :)

I know I could go into the sales of shoes but knowing me, I’ll just end up keeping all the shoes to myself. So the only option is to go for a course on shoes and later lecture others who are interested in this very important life changing subject. :)

Have a fantastic week!



Stay Strong!